smile and shrug

…what else can I do?


I heard the new baby’s heartbeat for the first time.  Yes, I cried.  And laughed.  And cried some more.

I’d had a very very very early ultrasound because I was so unsure of dates and the pregnancy could have been 4 or more weeks along than we realized and so I got to see the heart beating, a tiny blinking dot of something completely unidentifiable but utterly reassuring quite early on.  But that was almost 2 months ago.

Lately I’ve felt some mild ‘swooping’ feelings that I assume are movements from my little ‘roo but when I got to hear that fast, steady, very present sound: whow-whow-whow-whow-whow pumping away deep in it’s safe warm watery place, I was so thrilled.  Just as thrilled as I’d been the very first time I was pregnant 23 years ago, just as thrilled and amazed and grateful and in awe.  What an incredible blessing.  How could I ever take it for granted?  How could I have ever taken my OWN life for granted?

My heart beats.  My little ‘roo’s heart beats.  And together they create a pattern of a whole new life.


Single Post Navigation

Talk to me...

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s